Horrible mean reds

If you can't grasp the concept of moodiness (intended to use bipolarity instead but realized it was too extreme and worrying), you should meet me. I've been really down the past few days. Quoting "Breakfast at Tiffany's":

Holly Golightly: You know those days when you get the mean reds?  

Paul Varjak:  The mean reds, you mean like the blues?

Holly Golightly: No. The blues are because you're getting fat and maybe it's been raining too long, you're just sad that's all. The mean reds are horrible. Suddenly you're afraid and you don't know what you're afraid of. Do you ever get that feeling?

It might sound really, really sappy and unreal, but I turn into art when I'm sad so that is why I read or attempt to read and write poetry and lose myself in things beautiful (like Twitter, haha).

Coffee

Wrapping the fingers
around the feverish ceramic mug
of night in swirling milk.
Hot, as if it is sun.

Bitter. Boned barrels down my throat.
Triggered by the lack of reflection
or echoes that do not fit.

Caffeine drops on ailing corneas
Melt and liquify the edges of my body
so that the ceramic mug won’t be the bowl,
barrels touching the walls of my hope.
Explode! - and help me breath.

Wrote "Coffee" just tonight because something that I have been trying to lose by letting it fall off is coming back and I don't like it at all. What a bad stretch of days but I won't worry too much because as usual, it will be too dark and bad that the only way to go would be up.

PS: I have a feeling I'm only being emotional because I can't find my Apple earphones. Earphones are a necessity and my pair was already turning yellow because of loyalty and durability. Hate this. =(( Ironic: iTunes Philippines just opened.